A Pound of Flesh

Joe

Joe isn't quite sure what makes this day different.

Maybe it's the opposite. Maybe his last couple years had been the abnormal ones. His friends would certainly argue so; two years of studying, two years of sweating, two years of forgetting to eat and forgetting to sleep and having his head spinning from stress and anxiety.

Two years not so different from the rest of his life, actually. Maybe even a little easier; this endless summer of 1999 made him awfully resistant to petty things such as "hunger" or "sleep deprivation" or "pressure".

But that's the problem, isn't it? When was the last time he took time off for himself? When was the last time he looked, really looked in a mirror? Joe prides himself in being the normal one of the group. No wonder it takes him so long to realize that his perception of the world is skewed, too.

In all cases, here is the fact: on a Sunday morning, Joe wakes up. He yawns, he stretches, he brings his glasses to his nose.

And he sees his hand.

His heart skips a beat.

No. No. No. No no no nonoNOnoono no NO NO NO N O NO NO.

This is not right. This is not right. Hands shouldn't look like that. Hands don't look like that. Humans don't look like that.

His breath speeds up and he stumbles out of bed, holding on his bedside table with his- with this hand. Frantic, he knocks half his things off his desk, palming and looking and desperate-

His fingers close around a pair of scissors.

For a few seconds, he stares, unmoving, holding the tool up. He breathes deep and fast until he starts feeling dizzy, and he collapses on his chair.

The scissord clatter on the floor.

What is he doing? He was going to- he was about to- What the fuck is he doing?

He looks back at his hands- at the web that have grown when he wasn't paying attention, around his first knuckle. He had almost- cut it off. He'd almost sliced up his own skin.

God. What's wrong with him?

He can almost hear Gomamon laughing at him. You worry too much, Joe, you need to go with the flow!

Well. Between the two of them, Joe has never claimed to be the bravest.