Siblinghood

Kin is a strange one born in a strange world.

That’s how he feels, anyway. He is very small in a world of giants, monstrous tools and endlessly tall furniture. He is inclined to assume it’s all normal, because as far as he knows the neighbouring kids are just as clumsy as he is. However… honestly, he isn’t sure.

Because Kin hears things. He hears the adults speaking, high as they are above him, in hushed whispers followed by hasty glances. He may not understand all the words, but he’s not stupid. He can read the tones just fine. They are expecting him to do something- to be something, and they won’t tell him what it is. There is something wrong with him, but they won’t give him a clue about what it is, so he can’t even try to fix it.

And then, there is Kristal.

He doesn’t remember a time without her. She’s always been here for him, with stars in her eyes and warmth in her smile. She doesn’t mind that he does not talk; she’s smart enough to read the obvious clues in his posture and the expressions on his face, and whatever brief sound he manages to speak up suffices.

His sister hears things, too, though she never mentions them. He knows, because the whispering never stops, not really, especially in his presence. He can feel her hand tightening around his own at the sneered defective, her whole body tensing at each pitied glance.

He asks her about the meaning of one of those whispered words exactly once, one starting with an r. He sees her eyes widening at the word, her muscles twitching. She kneels beside him and tells him, with a gentle voice, that it is a mean word, a bad word, and he should never use it ever again and certainly never about himself. He doesn’t dare asking about the other words.

It occurs to him, in a passing thought, that maybe Kristal is like him; that maybe other children act as if her behavior was unsettling because it really is, that maybe her limbs are clumsier than others the same way his voice refuses to cooperate. That maybe that’s why she is the only person who makes sense in this strange world he was born in.

If that is the case, then perhaps being defective is not as much of a terrible thing as the adults imply.

*

It’s with Kristal he learns how to speak.

Words are… hard, for him. He thinks in concepts. But the whole process of spelling them out is… Finding the right words, that express the exact thing he means. Remembering how to string them together to form an acceptable, grammatically-correct sentence. Managing to move his mouth and tongue just the right way to create the corresponding sounds. All through the quiet, white static in his ears. It’s… difficult.

But his sister comes to him, one day, with one of those thick books she loves, and says, “Let’s learn together, shall we?”

Hands are difficult, too, but they are still much more easier than voice, if only because he doesn’t have to force the sentences out of his throat. Kristal is a novice here as well, which makes it a lot easier to work together. He shaliky shapes his fingers and his palms, and every smiles his sister gifts him is reward enough.

He thinks, if he’s honest with himself, that it’s kind of useless; his parents won’t bother learning his new tongue, and Kristal never needed words to understand him in the first place. But that’s okay. It’s a treasure only him and his sister share, and this only makes this new knowledge all the more precious.

*

Kin’s legs are as short as his sentences, so he doesn’t get to travel too far. Still, they are enough to explore New Bark town, small as it is.

Sometimes, when Kristal is feeling daring and the adults are busy, his sister takes him by the hand and brings him to the edge of route 29. Oh, neither is reckless enough to step in the tall grass- Kristal tells him not to, and he’d get lost in them anyway, unable to see past them.

But Kristal helps him climb all the way to the top of the tallest tree- the one with leaves shaped like hearts. From there, they can see far, really far, even in bad weather. He sits on the girl’s lap and look at whatever she chooses to point this day, listening to her soothing voice- here, can you see, Kin? That’s a rattata. Did you know they can sink boats with their teeth? And here! A hoothoot, sleeping on that branch. No, don’t worry, they got two legs, they just use only one at the time.

When they get back home, he tries to doodle what he saw during his outing. It’s hard, even when using Kristal’s books are reference- but he tries anyway.

She hangs every single one of them on the fridge with a proud smile.

*

Kristal loves to learn and loves to gather knowledge, but she also loves spreading it. Kin hears it in her words whenever she gets to share- excited and pleased, like the chirping of the birds playing outside.

Whenever he sees her flipping through dusty pages, he likes to come sit next to her. She doesn’t always speak up, engrossed in her studies, but that’s fine by him. He doesn’t speak much, either.

More often, though, she tells him about the thousand worlds contained in the paper.

She points at the pictures of rare foreign pokemon. The magnificent stantler, the powerful charizard, the trickster ninetales and the cute jigglypuff. She tells him about their behavior, their biology, their stats, their moves, their types, and a thousand other tiny details. She explains him in detail how bulbasaurs turn light into energy, feeding through their leaves as much as through their mouth; how magikarps stockpile raw powers during their lives to massively release it when they evolve; how eevee can adapt to any environment and situations.

She unfolds giant maps and runs her fingers across the roads. She tells him about other towns, other regions,other environments, other places. Kanto, the land of technology. Olivine and its lighthouse (have you ever seen sand Kin? I heard it’s like liquid pebbles, you can stand on it but it slides between your toes.) The cold ground of the ice path (Imagine those little ice cubes we have in the fridge, but all over the walls, the ground, the ceiling too, maybe.)

She gathers their stuffed toys and other action figures and reenact various myths, legends, and history events with them for him. The burning of the Ecruteak tower (a pile of jenga blocks) until the coming of the mighty Ho-oh (a large pidgey plushie.) The fall of team Rocket (all and every socks she could put her hands on) by the hands of the legendary trainer Red (an old doll sporting an oversized cap.)

She pours all her passion in every single one of those sharing sessions, and even if Kin never seems to manages to remember them fully, witnessing his sister’s hand flying as she speaks is enjoyable enough.

*

One day, his mother and father come to him and tell him, Kin, we’re going to Goldenrod for the week-end.

He’s heard a lot about the city, from Kristal’s speeches, but also from the radio. He knows this is the place where most radio shows originate from - they always speak of it as if it was a really important town.

His sister described it to him as “a piece of Kanto seeded in Johto”; a huge island of modernity in the sea that is the rural region. She warned him it was big, much bigger than New Bark town (look at the lake, look at how far you can see- if you were standing at the rim of Goldenrod, you would barely be able to see the opposite end)

Still, nothing could have prepared him to visiting the actual city.

He feels like he had just stepped into a storm. The town is shiny and colorful and bright like lightning, so much that it is dizzying. Sounds whirl around his ears like howling winds, loud excited chatters and heavy chorused steps on the hard ground. The raindrops seemed to have come down and taken human form to walk next to him, in a wave, in a sea, in an ocean of people invading every corner of his vision.

It’s kind of overwhelming.

It’s sort of scary.

But Kristal’s hand is firmly clenched around his own, so he knows he has nothing to fear.

The trip is, overall, pretty fun.

Kin gets to see the Radio Tower, which is so high he feels like it’s touching the sky.

(Kristal laughs and tell him it’s not possible, it’s that high so it can send waves far far away. Though her eyes are wide and her jaw slack as she speak, quieter than usual; she’s impressed, too. She’s not ruling out the possibility that he’s right.)

They visit the department store. Kin has only been to the mart in Cherrygrove a handful of times, and the contrast is great enough that he wonders if he’s still in Johto for a few minutes. The aisles are so big he could get lost in them, with shelves literally overflowing with items. He could live a full year here. He could live an entire life here.

(He does, in fact, get lost in there during a wild game of hide and seek. Kristal finds him predictably next to a set of toys. However, neither of them manage to find the exit. Fine by them; they have so much more to explore, to discover! Sure, his sister is a little worried, at first, but he makes her understand that it’s like an adventure, or- a quest! A treasure hunt! It seems to work; progressively, she relaxes, and soon she’s having fun again, commenting at various products while pretending to be a serious researcher documenting them with a goofy voice. Fine, their mother scolds them when they reunite once again. But it was worth it.)

They walk to the Goldenrod gym, too. Kin knows, from Kristal’s teachings, that it is one of the hardest, toughest, most unforgiving gyms around for new trainers. Personally, he thinks it looks really cute. An aesthetic he can get behind, honestly.

(Next to him, Kristal grins, an eager sort of smile he knows comes from the bottom of his heart. “I will get there.” she states. Not a wish, not a hope, but a truth. “I will get there and I will win.”)

(Kin knows his sister. She can do it. She will do it.)

*

Kristal is going to leave.

Now, that’s hardly anything new; Kin had always known she would. She’d told him, in great details, about her plans when she would set off; the roads she would take, the towns she would visit, in what order, down to what she would pack before leaving the house. She’d told him, every time she came back from the lab, how much she’d learned, how she would use it during her journey, how easier it would make some parts and how it brought some possible troubles to her attention.

Still, he’d always been under the impression that her hypothetical leaving would be in a far, far future, one that would never come. He’d assumed she’d always be here for him, like she’d been since the very beginning. Always by his side speaking, always by his side walking, always by his side to climb that one tree at the edge of town.

But he was wrong, and she’s going to leave, his sister is going to leave, leave him alone in this weird adult world while she goes wandering off in the dangerous untamed wild.

“I’ll be okay, Kin.” She smiles warmly, and even though he knows she’s right, he can’t help but worry. “And you will be, too.”

Her arms are warm around him.

They will be okay.

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